I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize