barbara walters just said penis...
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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