dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
