Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
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Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
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It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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