btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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