everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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