This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
