I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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