Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
