I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
