do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
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Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
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Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize