Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
i just made my gag reflex go away.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
