i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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