Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
