Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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