fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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