im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
you win again, gameday.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize
