this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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