i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Randomize
