Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
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