I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Enjoy the penises
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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