Dual....:-)
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
