I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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