why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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