He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
