I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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