I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
