if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
