Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
