you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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