Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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