there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Randomize