who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
is that a dick in a sweater?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
