Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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