spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize