I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
