You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
