wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Randomize
