She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
