A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
