Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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