Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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