The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
