Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
She's like a pop up book from hell.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He? As in you personified your dick?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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