he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
All I want is dick and wine.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
