your thong is hanging out like whoa
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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