Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
