Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
