i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
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Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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