Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
