I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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