he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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